Saturday, December 1, 2012

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Must We Lower Entitlements Expectations for Corporate Executives?

Oh Noes! fixed Lloyd Blankfein's comments for him
A: You’re going to have to undoubtedly do something to lower wealthy people’s expectations — the entitlements and what rich people think that they’re going to get, because it’s not going to — they’re not going to get it.
Q: The private jets, the limousines, the golden parachutes?
A: You can look at history of these things, and public trading wasn’t devised to be a system that allowed executives to enrich themselves at the expense of the shareholder for 25 years... so there will be things that, you know, the compensation system has to be changed, maybe some of the benefits have to be affected, maybe some of the bonsues eliminated. But in general, management's perceived entitlements have to be slowed down and contained.
Q: Because we can’t afford them going forward?
A: Because we can’t afford them.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

I Got a Binder, Got a Binder full of Women

I got a binder, got a binder full of women
Don’t know what’s real in lies I’m swimming 
oh oh oh oh
Do what you want but you're never gonna make me
Tell the truth you’re never gonna shake me oh, oh oh oh

Take me away, from this crazy race
I need to escape, get back to Bain
Take me away to better days
Take me away, when I made it rain

No FAIRRRRR! Sumwon call teh WHAMBULANCE!


Dear Mittens, when you are reduced to screaming at the moderator like a 2-year old who's lost his binky 'cause your brother stole it, well, you're losing. Kind of like the election.

Oh, and thanks for telling us about those "binders full of women" - I'll bet even the Truth Team didn't know about that one.

Thanks for 2012 sucker!!

Thursday, October 11, 2012

VP Debate Wrap UP


 

"I heard you were washed up, old man"

 

"You heard wrong, pretty boy"

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Ice Ice Romney

Ice Ice Romney
Ice Ice Romney

I'm a lyrical Mormon
Kickin ass like Stormin Norman!

Couldn't say at my convention
Don't trust the Palestinian intention!
Don't matter how much power we wield
Gotta kick the ball down the field!

Forget the Arab Revolution
I ain't down with no two-state solution!

Israel is so thorny
Just like Rafalca so horny!

We can't just stay calm
While Iran gets a dirty bomb!

Don't say I'm crazy
Cause I say Americans is lazy!
Dems are all fakers
We gotta give from tha takers to tha makers

Don't call me a rich dude
People always wantin' free food!

Gonna get beat by Obama
So bad gonna hurt my momma

Check out my book
while I hope something resolves it

Ice Ice Romney
Ice Ice Romney

Word to your Mother... Jones

Friday, August 10, 2012

CHRIS CHRISTIE SUCCESSFULLY LOWERED TO SURFACE OF MARS


PASADENA, Calif. -- In an unparalleled technological triumph, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie was lowered to the surface of Mars on the end of a 25-foot-long bridle suspended from the belly of a rocket-powered flying crane, kicking off an unprecedented $2.5 billion mission to relocate America's most annoying politicians to distant planets.

With flight controllers at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory anxiously watching, telemetry flowed in from the red planet.

154 million miles away and 13 minutes after the fact, Christie radioed back confirmation of touchdown at 10:32 p.m. PDT.

"It's just absolutely incredible, it doesn't get any better than this," said NASA Administrator Charles Bolden. "I was a basket case in there, I was really on pins and needles."

"It's a huge day for the nation, it's a huge day for science and it's a huge day for the American people," he said. "Everybody in the morning should be sticking their chests out, saying 'we just put Chris Christie on fucking Mars.' Because this belongs to all of us."

A Jubilant NASA Engineer Celebrates Landing of Chris Christie on Mars

Photo Courtesy of NASA


As Christie settled to the surface, the flight computer sent commands to cut the cables connecting it to the sky crane descent stage, which then flew away to a crash landing as planned.

After checking telemetry and confirming its status, a NASA engineer reported "Touchdown confirmed. Christie is on Mars!" 

"Holy shit. We really put that bastard on another planet" someone else said in the background. 

Amid jubilant applause and cheers, Bolden yelled out "One down - many more to go!"

Safely removed from doing further damage on Earth at the bottom of a deep crater, over the next two years Christie will await arrivals from from odious officials such as Rick Perry, Michele Bachmann, John Edwards, Scott Walker, Rick Scott and Paul Ryan.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Get Mitt Romney on This Varmint

"I've always been a rodent and rabbit hunter. Small varmints, if you will."

Mitt, New York Needs You!